Husband & Wife Edition:10 things marriage has taught us

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Hi people,hope your week was good? and hope the weekend is looking up as well.For me i've been a little ill so its a bleh type of weekend.I'm just catching up on Beauty & the Beast-the series and then i'll jump right into the new episode of Mistresses.By the way who watches mistresses?
Let me talk about it a little as it's kind of a husband,wife situation.
 So this doctor Karen helped out another male doctor's wife by donating her blood sample since she was the only match for his wife who was suffering from some sort of cancer and she later got close to his wife and then somehow the wife let her in on the fact that she and her husband din't get intimate anymore since she was diagnosed and that he saw her as a patient instead of his wife.So Karen as a psychologist started trying to help bring the fire back into their relationship and then boom she got caught in the middle..To cut the long story short it became a threesome between her and the married couple,they will wake up together in the morning and then go their different ways like it was normal.Karen said she thinks she might be in love with them both because they each have something she wants in a partner.It's just awkward because as much as it's fun she is the 3rd person in the relationship and if it all goes to pieces she will be so devastated because then she'll be hurt by 2 not 1 person but then Karen is always in complicated relationships,it's like she's drawn to them.hehe!

 So back to real life matters.I did a post here not long ago about how to keep yourself happy and i said when i could i will sit with my husband and ask him to give points on making relationships better especially of course things that have worked for us and we did this long ago,i've just been too lazy to type.
We put together 10 points-5 points each that have helped our marriage in the last 4+ years and trust me you never finish learning.Marriage is beautiful and complicated but keeping a settled mind makes you open to see reason why somethings may not be perfect.You can definitely pick a few as there are no assurances this will work in all marriages,it totally depends on the people in the marriage and the circumstances surrounding it.


  • You both can't be mad at the same time like c'mon 2 mad dogs will tear each other apart especially if there's no one to seperate them.Each of you has to learn to be the bigger person,that way there are higher chances of settling issues without too much noise.

  • Be Appreciative:Sometimes they want  you to acknowledge the effort they are making towards making you happy and giving you a comfortable life.You can say it with or without a kind gesture.

  • Keep 3rd party opinions at bay as much as you can and even if you must invite someone in you must be sure it is someone who won't be biased.The wrong opinions getting into your head will just be adding salt to injury.

  • Find something you both enjoy /love doing once in a while .It creates a sense of togetherness and unity.

  • Learn your partners weaknesses/soft spots and use it to calm them down when they are upset.

  • Listen even if you don't understand but try your best to understand too.Sometimes women or men bring matters to their partners  just because they need someone to lend an ear not necessarily like you could profer a solution but in all do everything you can to make them leave you better than they came.

  • Learn when to settle matters immediately and when to give space to let the other person calm down so they listen better to you.Sometimes anger takes control of our emotions and we don't want to hear what the other person has to say but as long as you know which fight should be settled there and then and which should be left to cool off on it's own the better .

  • Don't take yourselves too seriously.No matter the status of each of you,age,finances or otherwise-nobody is the boss.You are partners and should make things work together.Be playful,crack jokes,marriage is to be enjoyed.

  • Understanding:The fact that you are both different people coming to live under one roof is enough to make you have different opinions on things and react differently to things or see life differently and not be in sync all the time.This should be good enough reason to always try to make things that have to do with misunderstandings work.

  • Praying/Fasting/Reading the bible together:Whatever religion you share being humble together even in all your imperfections and reaching out to Him is a good thing.Reading the bible and trying to understand passages together opens up both your understanding of life and God.Seeking God and reaching out to Him as one shows that you both want the same plan God has for your family. 

Hopefully this is helpful to someone reading it.
What has helped sustain your marriage or what other points do you think can help keep a marriage happy&successful?
Please share!!

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  1. Dont wait so long to apologise... saying I'm sorry could never hurt anyone

  2. tanx cheechee, always learning a whole lot, evn wen im not married yet- lol.

  3. These are all great points. I've been begging Cakes to sit down and do something similar, but... Well, thankfully he did a video with me today, so hopefully it should be up within a week or two.

    1. Thanks for stopping by Berry! Love your blog :-)


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